Thank you for all of your prayers. My mother told me that I probably had the whole country praying for my sweet sweet sweet (did I say sweet?) Samuel. I could feel it. His GI Doctor is amazing – I have only wonderful things to say about him, and feel so blessed that Samuel is in his care. The nurses and anesthesia team were outstanding. And I had my dear friend, my rock, Amy right there by my side. I am so grateful for her.
Again, short and sweet, as I’m tired. Samuel slept wonderfully last night. He did great until the last 30 minutes or so when he was really hungry. I got to bring him back to the operating room, and held him when they put him to sleep. I kept telling him (loud enough for the room to hear) how much I loved him and how much I TRUSTED everyone in the room to take great care of him. Then I had to leave. That was hard…that was so so hard. I just walked out and didn’t look back. I don’t think my weary heart could have handled that. Just seeing the screens and monitors with his name everywhere was overwhelming. I can’t even type without tears…
We’re home now, and Samuel is sleeping. The tears just keep coming — you’d think I’d have cried enough by now. In fact, I cried in Trader Joe’s this afternoon to the sweet lady behind the coffee/juice counter. She was just commenting on how cute Samuel was (I had to stop there on the way home to get him food to eat as they told both him and I go on a gluten free diet) and another lady remarked about how he must have just got out of the hospital. So I told him that he was sick, and probably had Celiac, and then I started to cry.
In the middle of Trader Joe’s. By the coffee and yogurt and nuts.
Bless that woman — she didn’t stare, she just came around and gave me a hug and told me that she’d be here for me every time I came in. She took my veggie chips and put a big heart on them and wrote — no charge, gift from Trader Joes.
That little act of kindness was a huge act of kindness for my aching momma’s heart.
I don’t know the results of the biopsy. I am bracing myself for the diagnosis of Celiac Autoimmune Disease. The surgeon had a nutritionist visit me who handed me a 45 page photocopied book with info regarding Celiacs. Then, when the biospy was done, he came in carrying a pamphlet detailing Celiacs disease. Honestly, I am so tired of testing and know that if it came back unsure that we would have an even longer road of tests (even scarier than Celiacs) that I’m actually hoping that it is just Celiacs.
I can do it. God will give me strength. And I’m a fighter.
Thanks again for praying. Again, your words mean so much to me. More than I could ever write. I am blessed by each one of you. My friends.