this is a continuation of the letter dear overwhelmed mom
Now, you don’t know where to start.
The list of to-do things is so long. You feel like you’re drowning in things to do – laundry, cooking, cleaning, cleaning some more, teaching, gardening, shopping, organizing, potty-training, character training, mopping, sorting, praying, trying not worry, housework and more – and it’s only nine in the morning. You look around and all you’re seeing is the work that must be done. Yesterday.
It’s zapping the joy out of life.
Everything becomes a chore.
Being a mother begins to feel like a chore – the joy fades.
The little one running around makes a mess – more work. The milk spills, the blocks are dumped out, the paper thrown off the table, the bikes left on the walk, the piece of bread on the floor, the cabinet doors broken, driving to classes, and crayon on the wall – work, work, work. And it falls on your shoulders. Overwhelming, really.
I know. I’ve muttered words about being overwhelmed and how no one cares that the laundry is spilling out of the laundry room and that I feel so alone. Remember what I wrote you several weeks ago? Remember?
You’re not alone.
But, dear overworked mom, here’s the deal – you and I can’t stay feeling overwhelmed. We could, but then things would just keep piling on more and more and more. And then, we’ll be sitting in an even worse case of overwhelm. And the laundry will spill up the stairs, and the crumbs will grow, and life will become a chore. We’ll become miserable. Grumbling about being a mom because we lost the joy in being a mom.
So do that one thing.
I know I’ve written that to you before, but it’s easy to forget when you’re in the midst of a spinning and racing and busy life. But, I’m going to tell you again, just do one simple thing. Maybe it’s a load of laundry. Cooking breakfast. Cleaning off your island. Reading a book to the toddler. Sitting down with your teenager. Driving to the store. Letting yourself laugh again. One thing plus one thing plus one thing will get things done. Stop judging yourself by what you think others think you should do or what you think they get done or how things should look.
Here’s the truth – no one has a life that looks like a pinterest board. No one has a life stays like the page in the magazine. No one, no mother, can go through life without having those days where the hair stands up straight and you’re ready for the next day in the morning and the to-do list has things listed on it that should have been done last week.
Real life is messy. The beauty isn’t in the perfection, but rather in seeing the beauty in the everyday. Ordinary. In things that the world dismisses as imperfect, but we as mothers can see them as perfect.
It’s time that we link arms, mothers. Enough comparing. Competing. Putting on the masks of perfection that are leading each other to overwhelm. It’s time that we encourage each other to do the next thing, to get up, to keep trying, to keep moving, to rest when needed, to have grace, to love, to not judge, to find the joy in mothering. It’s easy to live in that overwhelm place of life, but then life just races by.
Oh, mom, with the forever to-do list, and littles tugging at your feet, and middlers needing to get driven some where, and more – this is just life. Busy, crazy, messy, perfect life.
You can do it. You can do your one thing and then move to the next one thing. You can calm your heart and choose to life with intentionality in the midst of crazy. You can say no to things in life and yes to others. You can love boldly putting your family first. You can do it, dear overworked mom, you can. You can slow down, really.
You can find joy in the midst.
It’s in the little things – the everyday overworked things that we miss when we live in overwhelm.
You can do it. You can live awake, intentional, and aware. You can do it.
Stand up. Pick one thing. Do it well.
You can do it. I am linking arms with you.
this post is part of an ongoing series of letters to moms.
Other letters include – dear overwhelmed mom Dear Moms with Littles, Dear Tired Mom, Dear Mom of the Little Boy with Celiac Disease.
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