you see versus they see

Some you see versus they see truths of motherhood:

you see – store bought pre made cookies that you put on the pan versus homemade.

they see – you made cookies. And cookies rock. Doesn’t really matter how they started.

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you see – a room that has marker on the walls, toys on the floor and clothes strewn about.

they see – their room where they can dream and play and sleep. A place of creativity where the books are in just the right spot and pillows tucked so and stuffed animals perched on the shelf. Where the toys are mixed up together making the most magical of stories.

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you see – laundry that you just folded all frustratingly jumbled in a drawer.

they see – a drawer full of clothes and their favorite shirt washed and put on the top and no more smelly underwear tucked in the corner that they tried to hide but you found and washed.

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you see – a pantry with far too little dinner options.

they see – the best dinner ever when you serve them rice and beans or pancakes or whatever they want.

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you see – a living room that has a ripped couch (or maybe that’s just mine)

they see – their home. The couch they run to after school and read on and play on and it’s family.

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you see – everybody else taking cool vacations.

they see – they’re just excited to go to Dairy Queen or to play catch in the backyard with you.

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you see – a crazy full schedule with this constant rush and hustle and movement and not sitting still

they see – that you got things in place and that you can find the missing soccer cleat and that you packed them their favorite snack and that even when you’re frazzled you still make it to practice on time and that you are simply there for them.

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you see – a toilet that never seems to stay cleaned

they see – well, not sure they see much here even though you work work work on getting them to aim.

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you see – that you got frustrated again over their homework

they see – that you actually care about their homework and grade but they keep that deep down because afar all who wants to admit that and actually red0 the homework sheet with sloppy writing?

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you see – clothes that need to be replaced

they see – their total favorite shirt that they would wear every single day if you’d just let them.

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you see  – you were late picking them up from school and made them stand in the cold.

they see – you were there running up to the door getting ready to greet them with hugs and kisses and questions about the day and they had five extra minutes to hang with their friends.

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you see – everything you didn’t accomplish today

they see – the fact that you were just there even if they didn’t say anything.

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you see – wondering if you matter.

they see – the only thing that makes things all better is a kiss from you.

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you see – when you look in the mirror a tired mom.

they see – the most beautiful mom in the world.

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you see – feeling like you’re failing.

they see – their mom that they love.

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you see – another day hoping you don’t mess up.

they see – their hero.

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Remember that today.

~Rachel

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17 Responses to “you see versus they see”

  1. April 7, 2015

    hollis Reply

    Love this! I walked in my son’s room and his dresser top looked like a toy box had exploded on it and then I looked closer. He had created this entire pretend world complete with Lego guys versus his Russian stacking ninja guys…and I took a picture of his dresser…and left his pretend world there.

  2. I loved reading this post! It’s such a great reminder of what is really important in life.

  3. April 8, 2015

    Jess Reply

    This was so encouraging and made me feel better about being a mom

  4. April 8, 2015

    Jen Reply

    Oh, this made me all teary.
    Thank you for your wonderful posts and the reminders of all the little things that really matter.

  5. April 21, 2015

    Rebecca Reply

    We have a blended family of 5! Oldest 13 youngest 2…

    The kids couch has rips in the basement… We fixed it with camouflage duct tape! The 3 oldest LOVE it!!! I no longer see a duct taped couch, I see the coolest couch ever just like they see…
    My biggest secret though. It was such a great idea and worked so well… My black leather couch has rips (upstairs family room) and it now has black gorilla tape holding it together! You can only tell first thing in the morning when the sun shines just right… No one has noticed!!! Lol. So no, your not the only one with ripped couches!

  6. May 5, 2015

    Summer Brackhan Reply

    I love the folded clothes verses clean clothes and the found hidden dirty clothes. haha! I think we’ve all been there.

    But most importantly, what a heartwarming and touching post to write from both perspectives. :)

  7. June 27, 2015

    Lori Griggs Reply

    Laughed and cried especially the failing verses what they see, also the tired Mom verses the most beautiful mom in the world! Great post :-) Thank you I needed this!

  8. August 5, 2015

    Rachel Osborn Reply

    Awww! That may be the sweetest thing I’ve ever read. I need to be more patient and loving towards my kids instead of feeling like a grumpy failure when I look around me at the mess every day. :)

  9. August 6, 2015

    julie essery Reply

    So very true, we get far to caught up in trying to be perfect, or trying to keep up with other mums that seem to have everything spot on, that we don’t always see it as it really is. I think we should all stop trying to be supermum, and just recognise that amongst all the mess and tantrums, in their eyes we are supermum. I love all your wisdom, and haven’t read anything that I can’t relate to. You have a natural ability to make me take a deep breath and appreciate my four beautiful children, and calmly think, when they are all left home pursuing their lives I can look back in my mind at all the chaos, and wish I was back there again, many thanks for your wisdom ands inspiration x

  10. September 2, 2015

    Nicole Reply

    You know, I almost made an appointment for a therapist this week. I’ve been extra worried and anxious about so many things in relation to my now 4 year old – his birthday is today. Thinking I’m not a good enough mom because of the things I can’t provide for him right now – in comparison to what I see other kids have/do or moms are doing. TO make matters worse (for me), he’s starting full-day kindergarten next week…leaving the child care he’s been at since he was 9 months old and are like family – an amazing support system! I’ve been petrified and sad that he’s going to have to become accustomed to a whole new set of people. Your posts have honestly been lifting this huge weight I’ve been carrying since he was born. I suffered from post-partum depression (even hospitalized for it), and now felt anxiety creeping through. But your blog has been the light I needed to shine on my days this week. I wish I had found your writing sooner. I’ve been coming back to your blog every single day this week. Some articles from other blogs and sites in still more fear in me, but yours is truly like the best therapy – knowing that all these things I worry about are shared with other moms, and are “normal”. I can relate to everything you write about and I feel so much better about my abilities in being a mom. Thank you so much for this blog *tears*. You have truly made an immense difference in my mental state and life in these mere 3 days. You are blessed with an amazing gift. Thank you (i can’t say thank you enough!)!! XoXo

  11. December 2, 2015

    Mindy Owens Reply

    What a wonderful reminder. So often we as mom’s are truly hard on ourselves. It’s a beautiful thing when we take a moment to change our perspective and learn how to love ourselves as much as we love our littles.

  12. February 2, 2016

    Dona Haggerty Reply

    Thank you! All of my kiddos are grown…most married with kiddos of their own… and I pass your blog writings on to them!!! You really know how to be transparent and real and encouraging! God bless you real good! :) <3

  13. February 14, 2017

    Kelley Reply

    Thank you!
    Embrace the crazy, Forget every now and then,because before you know it,they will be grown and doing their own thing…you will miss the crazy. You will miss someone needing you,and yes even the obnoxious laundry. Hold them a little longer today,before you know it you won’t be able too!

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