Sometimes I simply see the mess.
The dishes in the sink, the wrappers on the ground, the stuff left to do, the bills in the pile, the homework stacked.
I’m also really good at seeing the issues – kids and their grades or slammed doors and “I hate you’s” or all of that really hard stuff.
I’m just not that great at seeing the spaces in-between.
All of those times folding the socks or washing the towels or checking on the grades or putting away legos or saying prayers or waiting in the drop-off line. Those times of hoping and trying and standing up. Times of holding hands and holding buckets.
I spend so much time seeing the beginnings and the ends, that I actually forget that sacred space in-between. Yes, sacred. Because it is in that space where all the real life occurs. Real life is this sacred tension of ups and downs and joys and sorrows. Don’t let anyone deny the sacred of normal, because that is the space when life gets crazy we all crave to return. It’s the space where I learned to soothe colicky newborns or how to teach tying shoes. It’s where I learned to count to ten a dozen times. It’s where I learned bravery and when to ask for help.
It’s where I learned to cheer them on and shed a tear when they struggle. It’s where I found my voice and spoke up. It’s the courage of trying new things and sticking with it.
It’s the space of life.
Life has a tendency to celebrate all the starts and ends. The New Years and the resolutions and the marathons run. But in that celebration we so quickly can forget the tenacity of the in-between. Of the belief in
That’s where your story exists.
Not in the chapter starts or new beginnings or do-over moments. Not in all of that.
But in the showing up. The spaces in the normal. The giving of your heart. The loving no matter what. The tears behind bedroom doors and the tears in front of kids. The times spent sitting in school chairs much to small while you talk with teachers. The spaces of nothing for dinner and dishes to put away. It’s all of that. The giving of yourself grace when you mess up but more than that the determination of trying again and again.
Don’t live thinking life is graded by the end points.
The end points are simply points.
What really matters, what really is beautiful, what is love – it is you, in the normal, the every day, the real.
The sacred in-between.
Thank you for your in-between.
To learn more on how to discover the sacred in the normal of life grab my book -> The Brave Art of Motherhood
Originally found on the Finding Joy Facebook Page
I absolutely love this blog, I am a constant worrier and stress over almost everything, and I forget to enjoy the times in between, where life is raw and important and where love is felt and memories are made!! I do my best to make notice of all the in between more because they don’t stay little for long and I know this because my oldest is 24, and my youngest is already 4, and I have two boys in the middle 16 & 12
I am a worrier too. I think by nature, I worry. Seeing the spaces in the in-between, somehow it helps me not worry. Maybe not the entire way, but less because instead of worrying I’m replacing it with perspective.
Thank you for your kind words.