My Elijah turned eight today.
Somehow birthdays make me think about the things that matter the most in life. Like these eight truths about mom moments in life. These are the moments that we simply cannot fail at and honestly man oh man, I have learned in my twenty years of being a mom I simply do not want to miss. Be blessed.
1. Those times we say yes. Because truthfully, at least for me, it’s so much easier for me to say no. It’s my default go to word or phrase I think (read No, I’m going to say Yes). But over the past year my good friend Dan has been challenging me to look at all the no’s and to try to replace them with a yes. And honestly, I don’t regret a single one. Where can you replace that no with a yes today?
2. Those times you let them stay up a bit later. I don’t know why, but I suppose it goes back to the saying of yes, but somehow that extra fifteen minutes brings them so much joy. Isn’t that an awesome part of motherhood? Those moments where we can just bless them for being awesome. It’s not every night, but sometimes those times when you’re like okay stay up and watch another show or finish that game and so on matter so much.
3. When we trade our busy for their busy. Laundry will always be there. Dishes too. So will bill paying. Vacuuming. Dusting. Cleaning bathrooms. All of it. Littles who want to play Candyland or go to the park or read an extra story will not. Sometimes, and I know this is hard because I struggle here, we just simply have to push our busy to the side and make their busy trump.
4. When we don’t worry so much. Us moms worry, don’t we? We think that we need to push push push so they’re not behind. We fret over so much and sometimes just lose the moment of letting them be kids. There’s something absolutely beautiful about the wonder that our kids have – so that worry – the more we can tuck it away and just be with them the better.
5. The bad dream moments when they want to jump in our bed. My oldest is a sophomore in college 1900 miles away from me. Sometimes I wonder when the last time I was the go-to bad dream solution. I know she calls me now when she needs me and I’ll never tire of that. Nor will I of my littlest needing me during those bad dream moments. Most nights. Hahah. The last moments will come. Embrace today as much as you can. Not all of it. But the moments you can.
6. For friends to come over. Wow. I wish I had learned this earlier – the value of friends. Our kids friends don’t care if the house is perfect or if their bedroom looks like it’s a page from a magazine or a Pinterest pin. They’re just kids and want to play. I wasted so many years saying no to this because I didn’t like my home and in that squished away moments of friendship. So in my learning to say yes it means learning to be spontaneous and to let my kids simply be kids.
7. For all the times we held their hand and all the times we let them walk on their own. Yes. This. Tears. It’s kind of like the bad dream solution, but in a different way. For so long the holding hand moments are sweet – this protecting, loving, guiding bit of life until the day that I just experienced with my six year old when he said I’m big now momma you don’t need to hold my hand. While my eyes welled with tears my heart swelled with pride. Embrace the tension and beauty in both.
8. For birthdays being special. It’s funny. For so long I thought it was the really really big things – the cool gifts, the parties, the stuff. But, but but tonight I was so humbly reminded that it’s the little things that matter most. I told my Elijah he could choose whatever he wanted for his birthday treat and he chose an 85cent sprinkle doughnut. And then, then he chose a $10 gluten free cake for his brother Samuel because he couldn’t eat gluten and he wanted him to have something awesome. If there ever was a moment where I was more proud I can’t think of it. Birthdays aren’t the big stuff – it’s the moments. That’s what we’ll remember.
Eight no fail moments to not miss. What would you add?
ps. And always always let them end the hug. You will never regret that moment. Ever.
And…tears. You’ve reframed some of the everyday in such a lovely way here. Thank you. And — the donut looks amazing! I’d pick it as a birthday treat, too. 🙂
My Elijah turns 7 in a month! Maybe it’s the fact we both have Elijah’s, or are just trying out best to be the best mamas we can or the fact you are so real- whatever it is thank for being a light in those dark days where we think “only I am the worst mama alive.” Your insight and raw words have caused me to remember the little things we only get to cherish for so long. thank you!!!
You’re my favorite! Thanks for reminding me of the good stuff!!
Hi, and the sweetest smile on their faces when we give them a surprise, this are moments that money can’t buy… Thanks for sharing a beautiful post.