…wait.
Yep. Wait. Four little letters making a word that drives me batty. I am not a wait kind of gal. I’m a let’s fix it so I can move on with life kind of gal.
Actually, the surgeon wants me to do 3 weeks of intense physical therapy to see if we can strengthen that pesky pesky shoulder of mine. My mri was fairly inconclusive thanks to almost 20 year old anchors placed in my shoulder from my previous surgeries. So, I have to work with a physical therapist in order to judge strength and stability. Starting today.
That means if I have surgery it will be in the beginning of September. When school starts.
I had intended to start this school year running. Flying. On schedule. You know, organized. Ready to go. Ahead of the curve. Eager. Not possibly recovering from major shoulder surgery.
Let it go.
That’s what I’m telling myself. Learning doesn’t have to start in early September. We can start later. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. But, I don’t want to. I want to cling so tightly to this idea of having the perfect 2011-2012 school year that takes place with a magnificent launch in September. Oh, that was my wish.
I’m starting to realize that success and joy cannot be based on a silly September start date.
Let it go.
We cling to stuff, don’t we? It’s ironic the things that get me worked up — schedules, and organization, and the perfect plans. When they don’t seem to go the way I had envisioned it takes me a bit to regroup — to let it go. But, you know, if I sat here lamenting about my not so ideal September it would trickle down to my family. They’d pick up on the vibe, the mood that I’m in. I don’t want frustration to run deep — that’s not me.
So I tell them that ninja mom is going to go work that shoulder out. And who knows — maybe I won’t need surgery and can just get by doing physical therapy for the next 3-4 months. Ha ha ha — my arms would be in awesome shape.
Let it go.
But whatever it is? I’m okay with it. We’ll adapt. And life doesn’t have to be based on that day in September.
I won’t let it be.
18 comments
Yes, everything will be ok. You know that, so you’ve already won the battle!
Now, go do your shoulder exercises! 😉
And you’re off….to the next chapter in this journey of your life. God’s been with you this far…He’ll go with you the rest of the way.
Lovely post, Mrs. Martin. Sometimes we need to let go of a lot of hopes and dreams, and just do what He has planned for us.
I thought you might want to listen to this song – it’s always uplifting to me. 🙂
Love,
~bree
I hope in whatever happens you will find peace!
You are totally going to have Jennifer Aniston arms! Just like in your previous post about not having to have a fancy or “perfect” room, the same goes for your schedule. School will happen and with His schedule it will be perfect. Prayers will continue to be lifted for you friend 🙂
Oh man, I’m sorry you’ll have to wait for surgery!! But on the bright side, it’s already August 10th, so September isn’t too far away. I’ll be praying for you!
And we make our plans, but God directs our steps. May He give you much peace, Rachel, as you get rested and have your strength restored. I hope your recovery is faster than you could even hope for!
Yes, do your shoulder exercises. . . if you don’t your shoulder will freeze, and then you will have to have the dreaded UNFREEZE surgery.
When I had my C5-C6 discectomy and bone fusion, my left arm ached and I didn’t want to move it, and the physical therapy was medieval!
But I was petrified by the thought of UNFREEZE surgery. So I did my shoulder exercises and had a lot of good cries!!
Praying for you sweetie! I know it’s rough!
I hope these exercises work. But if they don’t, I believe God put that there for a reason. He will get you through it. You can only learn and grow from whatever is in your path.
I work part time and had thought my schedule for fall was set in stone…then on Monday, I found out it wasn’t. I was upset that my boss wanted me to work different hours. I had already made plans for some of those hours (piano lessons). I spent all morning yesterday working things out…and I actually think it may work better this way.
I really really hope and pray that the pt will be the cure. But if not, then for some God ordained reason you’re suppose to get the surgery later rather than now. Which must be stressful. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this as you start the school year. May God shower you with unexpected blessings through this trial. Xoxo!
I understand how you’re feeling right now because I’ve been there with different medical issues–it’s so stressful to have something big interrupt our start time–but God is good, and He will give you all what you need WHEN you need it regardless of what day it is on the calendar. So hard to remember but so important that we do. I am praying for you!
I’m sorry – I can’t imagine how frustrating it is right now. Go and do those exercises and get that shoulder strong – and see what happens in September!
These big plans of ours can get us in all sort of trouble 🙂 I find some of my biggest disappointments are because things didn’t go as I had planned. It’s interesting because I can’t see the bigger plan…only the Father knows these things.
I’m really sorry that your shoulder has thrown off your schedule. I would be really stressed, and I’m impressed with your positive attitude. Being flexible and changing plans isn’t easy, especially when it’s something so important. Good luck at PT! You got this!
Oh yeah, I watched Family Feud growing up. I totally got it!
The Lord has His timing for all things. Let it go and give it to God. It will all be okay. Praying that He will keep you in His perfect peace.
So how did it go with therapy today? Hope it wasn’t too painful!
Know that I’m always here praying!
Psalms 116:3-7 The sorrows of death compassed me, and the pains of hell gat hold upon me: I found trouble and sorrow. Then called I upon the name of the LORD; O LORD, I beseech thee, deliver my soul. Gracious is the LORD, and righteous; yea, our God is merciful. The LORD preserveth the simple: I was brought low, and he helped me. Return unto thy rest, O my soul; for the LORD hath dealt bountifully with thee.
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This is such a wonderful reminder of things you can’t and can control! It is so well written.
I’ve been homeschooling for 20+ years and I don’t think I’ve ever had “the perfect school year”, whether we started off ready and organized, or not.
The past 2 years, I’ve taken the kids on cross country road trips to start off the school year and we haven’t started book work until October. I LIKE that kind of schedule. We’re hoping for another cross country trip to start off this year, as well. We will hopefully be exploring New England in September, in stead of pulling out our math books.
🙂 🙂 🙂