Need a reminder of the awesomeness of a mom? Here you go. 24 things. Out of infinity, of course.
1. They have the ability to super clean the house when someone calls and says that they’ll be dropping over in five minutes. They know exactly where an empty box is to quickly dump things in, which room to put it in, can vacuum and clean at once while putting their hair up, and can start the coffee. Can you imagine if that superpower could only be harnessed and used at anytime? Wait. We kind of already do.
2. Will listen to the always overly descriptive drama like he took my baseball cards or she has more ice cream or it’s not fair that she’s sitting in that seat or I can’t go to school today because I don’t have the cool shoes or insert anything that kids love to argue about and then will apply more wisdom in Solomon in deciding the solution. And sometimes the solution means simply deciding to let them battle it out.
3. Drive here and there and everywhere and back to here and there and everywhere again. And again. And again. Thank goodness for Starbucks and Pandora
4. Can erase bad dreams at night. Often it involves waking up completely, holding children, tucking them in again, moving them to her own place of sleep knowing very well that at that moment on her sleep will no longer be real sleep but will rather be a martial art exercise in avoiding feet and hands from smacking her in the face as the child who had the bad dream now slumber peacefully while rotating.
5. Will cook meals. Will slave over meals. Will invent meals. Will make the best meal ever only to be met with I don’t like this and then the next night when it is boxed macaroni and cheese she’ll hear that this is the best meal ever. Just let it go. I suppose when you’re five macaroni and cheese with dried powder is the best meal ever.
6. Know to replace things. Like the toilet paper roll that the child just left sitting on top of the roller. Or the paper towels. Or the hand towels. Or the light bulbs in the bathroom burnt out. Or the pencils that are now broken. Or the markers. Or anything. Moms know.
7. They understand the art of playing games. From those first games of slapjack where the moms hand is just a tad bit too slow. To the sneaky skill of playing Candyland and hiding that card where you have to go back to the beginning. To learning when it’s truly okay to win and that you’ll hear words of frustration but you teach the art of shaking hands and saying good game. Moms get games. It’s like life – a gradual teaching of how to deal with the world.
8. They are skilled negotiators and can make negotiating not feel like bribery. Even though, shhhh. . . sometimes it just might be. There are times when if you go to bed and fall asleep in the next ten minutes I will give you a dollar is perfectly acceptable. Grace, moms, grace.
9. The are the Orkin Pest Control person disguised as a mom. Creepy crawly things? Scream for mom. Things moving in the house that shouldn’t be? Get mom. It doesn’t matter that you use an entire wad of paper towels – enough to wipe up the largest spill – to dispose of that spider. The fact is – you did it. You are bugs in your home worst nightmare.
10. The Orkin Pest Control person disguised as a mom with a heart of gold. You know what I’m talking about. You grab that gigantic wad of paper towels to dispose of that arachnid in your child’s bedroom only to be heard don’t kill it mommy. It eats mosquitoes. Or it’s good for the world. And in that moment you have the skill of the greatest animal rescuer as you carefully get that spider which has no place in your home and carefully bring it outside as your seven year old cheers you on.
11. They can open things. Like these fruit cup things that are filled with juice to the top. Or doors while they’re juggling a toddler on their hip while holding four bags of groceries and a grande caramel macchiato. Or cans when the can opener is broken. If it’s stuck a mom can open it.
12. Can answer to I’m hungry. I’m starving. There’s nothing to eat. When’s dinner? Can I have a snack? over and over and over. And then when you offer apples, carrots, or anything healthy and you hear I don’t want that you always know to reply well, then you’re really not that hungry.
13. Stay up late. No matter what. For the times when the teenager is out or the middle schooler needs to be picked up or when there is the crazy sleepover at her house and she’s uttered lights out a dozen times but still hears the giggles. (And then, moms are cool, they just let the girls giggle because they know that’s part of the whole sleep over thing.) Moms give up sleep. For 18 years a child.
14. Moms understand that every once in while that it is okay to say yes to the stuff at the end of the cash register counter. Sometimes it is gum. Other times the over priced bag of fruit snacks (especially when you know you could get a box of six for only 32 cents more). The lego stuff in the bags. Silly putty. Tape (yes, my kids have asked for tape). And sometimes a candy bar. Yes. Us moms get it. And for our kids? That’s pretty much the best day ever.
15. Have the ability to translate two year old talk. The world might hear a bunch of consonants and vowels strung together in a gibberish sound, but the mom? The mom knows. Oh, you want a fruit snack? You don’t want to nap? We get it. It’s a secret code.
16. They hide chocolate. No more words needed. Just know this is a brilliant survival tactic.
17. Are not afraid to dance in the kitchen, sing out loud, spin in circles, play music, and just have fun to music that they loved in high school Us moms have those moments where we can just make the kids laugh. Let the dishes go for a moment. Or maybe just do the dishes while dancing and being happy. There’s power in that. So find your favorite oldies (hahah. . . aging) channel on Pandora or Spotify and just dance.
18. They can find the one pencil in the house that works during homework crunch time. It doesn’t matter that at the beginning of the school year you stocked up on pencils at Target when they were practically giving them away. You know that the day will come when there will be no sharp pencils and the 7 pencil sharpeners that you have purchased will be lost. When push comes to shove you’ll find that pencil. Or you’ll whittle away at the dull ones with a knife until the fourth grader can write.
19. Can take a teen age daughter shopping knowing what to suggest because that won’t be chosen so that the items that you think should be chosen will be chosen. Moms can also with grace redirect away from ridiculous clothing that should never be on a teenagers body. It’s a skill moms. Sometimes we’ll fail. But we do prevail.
20. They understand that slammed doors I hate you’s times of storming about and normal kids stuff are normal. And deep down moms know that they’re doing something right – setting limits – and that someday those kids will remember that mom fought for them.
21. Have the ability to find anything that is lost. It could be lost for a minute, months, weeks, or an undetermined amount of time. Moms can find it. It can be from I can’t find the ketchup in the fridge (which is always in the door on the right side next to the Italian dressing) to homework that is lost (thank goodness for downloads on the school portal) to ballet shoes or soccer shoes or birthday invitations to that pencil. If it’s lost – mom is there.
22. Can make things work. Like getting the kite to actually get up in the air knowing that within 11 minutes it will no longer be in the air but rather in your neighbor’s trees. Then moms know the exactly the right pressure to exert while pulling on the string that cuts into her hands to release that kite from the trees. Moms can fix toys, make kids believe that once the battery dies that they can’t be replace on those loud toys, they can make meals from scraps, and Halloween costumes from the dress up box. Moms make things work.
23. Have story reading strategies. They know the exact variations on voices that makes the three year old’s laugh. They know which stories to choose and which to tuck away at the library. They also know how to edit stories that are too long without giving away that they’re reading the abridged version. Come on, admit it. . .
24. They believe in their kids and their dreams. Maybe you told them you want to go to the moon. Then moms have books from the library on space. A baker? We’re watching Food Network together. No dream is too silly for moms. In fact, that’s the cool gift that moms give their kids. Moms are the ones they come to when they decide they want to play soccer after you’ve just invested in pointe shoes for ballet. Moms understand the need to look through 42 college applications trying to find the perfect fit. Moms are there for their kids. Kind of like glue. They fill in the spaces, make connections, love no matter what, and believe that their kids are the most awesome kids in the world.
Moms do awesome every day ordinary just what moms do things.
They are their kids number one fan.
And that? That’s priceless.
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