If you can’t breathe and you’re feeling the pressures of being a mom let me tell you – I get it.
Sometimes the pressures of being a mom can crush and overwhelm. Especially during the holidays. Then it seems like not only do we have to win at the motherhood thing but we’re now thrust in the crazy world of holiday expectations, that if you’re like me, you’re bound to fail at. Even though it’s not failing, it’s just pressures.
Lots of pressure. That sometimes can knock the wind out of our sails.
But what if what matters is what you and I are already doing?
Like throwing on our boots and going out in the cold and playing with our kids in the snow even when we have a million and five other things we could be doing. Or tucking our kids into bed at night, whispering prayers with them, and staying up late working so that we can pay the bills. Or being grateful for the food in the pantry, being okay with serving the applesauce, and simply doing the best we can do.
Motherhood is bursting with these most simple moments.
Little thing matter moments.
There’s no grading system for motherhood.
It’s really about showing up.
You wake up, you love your kids, you take care of your kids, you try to make today better than the next, you switch that laundry and fold those socks, you make the meals, you drive to classes and you give of yourself. Sometimes it’s a giving in a life that is so far from perfect that it makes you want to throw your hands in the air and yell it’s not fair. Sometimes it’s simply a life that is simple and normal and peaceful and you wonder if this is all there is. And sometimes you are content, bored, tired, eager, joyful, and simply thankful – even if the room that you cleaned at nine am is a mess at nine fifteen am.
It’s a beautiful tapestry of moms that work, moms that stay at home, moms that vaccinate, moms that don’t vaccinate, moms that are single, moms that are married, moms that are divorced, moms that eat only organic, moms that love the convenience of boxed food, moms that are grateful to simply have food, moms with babies, moms with toddlers, moms with middle schoolers, moms with highschoolers, moms with kids that are gone, moms who homeschool, moms who send their kid to private school, moms who send their kids to public school, moms who simply need a friend, and well, we’re all just moms.
Cutting snowflakes matters. Making pizza matters. Finding missing socks matters. Taking temperatures matters. Listening to stories matters. Writing notes matters. Driving to classes matter. Folding clothes matters. Counting to ten again and again matters. Laughing matters. Rocking babies in rocking chairs matters.
All of that normal everyday motherhood stuff matters.
So breathe.
You’re a mom that is real.
That’s what matters.
~Rachel
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14 comments
How about adding “tired.” Days seem to be getting longer and nights shorter…I B tired!
Stopping by to let you know I’m still here praying!
Psalms 59:16-17 But I will sing of thy power; yea, I will sing aloud of thy mercy in the morning: for thou hast been my defence and refuge in the day of my trouble. Unto thee, O my strength, will I sing: for God is my defence, and the God of my mercy.
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I love this, Rachel! I’ve been struggling lately at trying not to be one of the moms that cause division or another mom to feel judged. Im such a passionate person and it comes across as judgement sometimes. Your posts lately have touched me to tears 🙂 thank you for writing beautifully and honestly.
Loved this Rachel! One of my new favorites. And the picture of Samuel sleeping – priceless!
Well said and thank you so much for that!!!
The Lord is always with you and I’m here praying!
Psalms 18:2-6 The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower. I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies. The sorrows of death compassed me, and the floods of ungodly men made me afraid. The sorrows of hell compassed me about: the snares of death prevented me. In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried unto my God: he heard my voice out of his temple, and my cry came before him, even into his ears.
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I think people judge everyone not just Moms
Great post! I for one go to bed many nights feeling like I’m failing my 7! I don’t have enough money to give them the life they deserve,I can be short on patience at times etc. but, I love them with everything that is in me and I do my best!
That word I added in the first entry? Oh my in spades today! 12 hours of babysitting…I B TIRED!
Praying!
Psalms 18:30-32 As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust in him. For who is God save the LORD? or who is a rock save our God? It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect.
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I love this! As a working mom, I often hear comments about missing things or even a continuous commentary from a friend who tells me that because I work, I get days off, I don’t have to work 24/7 to care for my kids. Enough already, you know? Moms are moms, working out of the house or in the house or whatever. No one has it harder, we’re all working towards the same goal: happy, healthy children. My youngest has special needs and daily I wonder if I’m doing xxx right or wrong, but you do the best you can and at the end of the day, hug them and feel blessed no matter what!
Thank you for that!! Well said!!
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Loved this! I am winding down our school year and suffering from a serious case of burnout!!! This was the perfect read this morning, thank you 🙂
Grandmas are moms too, just old ones. We have been through those terribly busy years back when we were ONLY moms, trying to juggle everything and having some parts fall, not getting everything done right. There are a few things I can say about the craziness… it doesn’t last. You will have to watch each child leave you and no longer need you in the same sense. Cherish it all NOW. The good times, the bad times, the routine times, the busyness of things. Most of all cherish each moment you have with your child. As a Grandma, I struggle with life, as my heart is broken over things such as stillbirths, miscarriages, tubal pregnancies… things that devastate my little girls, now grown up. Their husbands are now the comforters, hardly ever am I needed for that. It is their joint tragedy… and sometimes I feel like an intruder trying to weasel my way in, so I try not to. And life does not get any easier once they have left the nest. Above all, be tolerant and help mold your little ones, and remember that they are only children (that lasts until they leave home) and their childhood is only there for a short time. Let them be children, although corrective measures may be needed. Let them play, although there may be rules. Let them make mistakes, but then face the consequences, TOGETHER. Don’t be a dictator just to keep order – they are not little soldiers, they are children. Enjoy the little things — bouquets of dandelions or leaves, reading together,staying involved. It will pass and you may well have missed out on the best years of your lives. Hug them all the time and let them know how much you love them regardless of behavior or mistakes. You are their crucial influence. One day you will look back and wonder where the time went… and wish you could grab just a piece of that hectic life once again. ENJOY your time NOW. XOXOXO