those no sleep kind of nights

by Rachel Marie Martin
rock sweet samuel
go to bed late
one with a bad dream
thunderstorm
one wakes up to the thunder
shoulder aches
one awake at 4am talking
move to couch
boys awake and whispering at 6am
everyone awake
including me
one tired mom

All leads to one of those no sleep kind of nights.

And I honestly feel just a wee bit crabby in my oh, so tired, body state. I’d really like to curl up under my covers and grab an insane amount of sleep due to massive amount of sleep deprived years. Blessed years, but low sleep years.

So now, I’m sitting in our kitchen, at the island, listening to the little boys chatter around me – See this turtle I drew? Milk, please? The thunders were loud — i wasn’t scared. Look a dinosaur! – and it softens the crabby part of me. They didn’t intend to wake up to lessen my sleep. They’re little and crying in the night for mom. And I want it to be that there are no stipulations to that — my mornings and moods shouldn’t change.

I just will have to drink more coffee.

And lean on the Lord more.

And take a nap this afternoon.

Maybe.

But for now, I’ll sit here, with my early morning hair pulled back into the obligatory ponytail and no makeup on my face, and for just a second more, listen to those sweet words from the boys, unload the dishwasher, put a smile on my face — a real one, not the plastered on one, and will go about my day grateful for those awake throughout the night little boys. Yes, content.

Coffee run, anyone?

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14 comments

Shannon August 13, 2011 - 1:06 pm

Great perspective, praying you get that nap

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Gen August 13, 2011 - 1:11 pm

yes, coffee…lots of coffee!

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Holly August 13, 2011 - 1:26 pm

Get some rest, Sweet Pea, whenever and wherever you can.

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HopeUnbroken August 13, 2011 - 1:33 pm

making that virtual coffee run with you 🙂 awake at 2:00, and never went back to sleep, but no little boys were the cause. just my own blasted insomnia and pain.
blessings on your day, and may God keep your attitude what it was as you posted this. that was an encouragement and testimony that i needed to hear this day.
steph

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Theresa August 13, 2011 - 2:05 pm

I always love the perspective and inspiration and new way to think of things that you always offer. You and your blog are such a blessing!

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Kiley August 13, 2011 - 2:12 pm

the storms kept a lot of my family awake too, last night. i’m sorry you didn’t sleep much, praying you can get a nap in. :]

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carissa August 13, 2011 - 2:50 pm

Sometimes it’s okay to be tired, especially after your sleepless night… I hope you get a long nap today. You look adorable sportin that pony and holding your Sam. You pull off the zero night’s sleep look pretty darn well… You look pretty and rested!

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JillAileenJones August 13, 2011 - 3:20 pm

Coffee-YES!! I was up too, it has been almost 4 months since we have had rain and so I think my kids forgot what it and thunder sound like so two of mine were up too. It does make for a long day and my father in law is coming today from TN to stay with us for a few days and so I have lots to do. 🙂 But we needed it so very bad that I am trying to be VERY thankful today for the lack of sleep due to the beautiful rain we so needed.
Praying you have a great day and that a nap is in your future. Take one for me too 🙂
Hugs
Jill

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Emily (Laundry and Lullabies) August 13, 2011 - 3:52 pm

I didn’t get awakened last night, but I’ve been dealing with some kind of chronic fatigue for too long…so I’m empathizing with you. Thank you for the reminder to smile, really smile at my boys.

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Emily of The Best of this Life August 13, 2011 - 6:17 pm

I hope you got a good cup of coffee this morning and a restful nap this afternoon 🙂 I just fell upon your blog and I’m happy I did…. you’re a brave, brave woman!!!

xo Emily Lynne

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Kelli August 14, 2011 - 3:06 am

I love the pic of you and Sam. I love how you work with God to show your children grace. I love that you share your struggles to encourage others, like me. I’d love to bring you coffee.

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Lynn August 14, 2011 - 6:03 am

You know I thought once the kids were grown I wouldn’t have problems with sleep deprivation anymore. Not working out like I thought! Between not being able to get to sleep…waking up and not being able to go back to sleep…and a certain daughter who hasn’t gotten her license yet so I get to be taxi driver…still not getting enough sleep!
Here praying as always!
Psalms 18:28-30 For thou wilt light my candle: the LORD my God will enlighten my darkness. For by thee I have run through a troop; and by my God have I leaped over a wall. As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust in him.
Prayer Bears
My email address

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Krista August 15, 2011 - 4:33 pm

Been there! Though probably not as often as you 🙂 Hope you get some rest soon and I admire your ability to put on a “real” smile. So hard sometimes….

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Steph @ MomKaboodle November 22, 2011 - 2:11 pm

yep, I can totally relate! Thanks for softening MY heart with the reminder that they don’t mean to lessen our sleep….they just need their mommy (and daddy)….

Thankful for the coffee….and the grace extended to us daily!

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