perfectly imperfect motherhood revisited

In case you were wondering, I was the gal at Costco with 72 eggs in her cart on top of 13 pounds of oranges and bags of lemons. And then I became the gal at Target with another 3 dozen added to my cart next to the fifty cent a bag Easter grass that I always regret purchasing because it makes such a mess but it’s such a part of Easter.  As I pushed those 36 eggs through the checkout the sweet gal swiping my groceries over the scanner commented on the amount of eggs I had purchased. Inside, I thought if only you knew how many were in the back of my car right now as I smiled and told her I had a big family and that the kids love to color those eggs. Those cartons of eggs, white and unadorned made there way in the trunk of my little car full of food and to my home.

When are we going to color the eggs momma? Now? Now?

Boiling 108 eggs is no small task. Not at all. It means multiple pots boiling and bubbling and windows cracked and moisture on the window. It means little ones running in and out and wondering if they’re done. It’s bowls of ice water with hot eggs dipped in them so that the shell doesn’t stick and cracked eggs waiting for littles to sample them. It’s the kitchen timer set, and cooling racks set out, and the afternoon March sun flittering through the window.

And then the 97 remaining eggs are doled out. Counted one by one by one to eager hands waiting to color them perfectly. Hands grab the eggs and drop them in colored water cups – with vinegar as well because the color is so much more vibrant – and hope began. Hope about creating the most beautiful egg – it’s the anticipation, the creativity, and the seeing of an idea come to fruition.

But then, one drops. The color isn’t right. The crayon drawing is not what was imagined. The dye spills and leaks through the layers of adds covering the old farm table. There isn’t a spoon. The colors get mixed. Fingers are stained. There isn’t the color that one wants to use.

It wasn’t what was expected.

The anticipation of the perfect looking Easter egg that would be the crown jewel ended up looking nothing like what was imagined in the mind. The blue is faded, the cracks larger, and the color seeped through. And then, five year old Elijah holds up this cracked egg in his green and red stained hands with a proud smile on his face.

It’s beautiful momma. Beautiful.

Even in the not expected, in the imperfections, there still was beauty.

So it is with life and motherhood. When we’re little there are the dreams, the perfect plans, the ideas, the trips to Disney, the kids who just listen, and all of these amazing goals. And then life, and real motherhood  happens – with the cracks, bumps in the road, and colors that didn’t turn out anything like we planned. And it would be so easy to look at life and think that it looked nothing like we had planned but then sweet friends we would be missing the beauty in the life we are living right now.

Motherhood is often like those eggs – moments where the color runs everywhere and there’s a big crack down the side – and little ones who don’t see all the mess ups but rather see the beauty of the moment with you by their side. The moments are the beautiful things, the time together side by side coloring in a book, and side by side in the car. It’s a collection of moments, next to each other, some plain, some beautiful, some with deep cracks, and some unexpected that make this beautiful collection called life.

And yet, in the middle of it all, often we’re surprised at how some of the most unexpected moments are the most beautiful. Celebrate yours today. In the midst of the messy, the unexpected, and the normal – look for the simple gift. Motherhood can be overwhelming, challenging, and with many of those spill moments mixed together with the you’re the best mom ever and perfect feeling days. The balance of both is what creates the beauty in life. If it was all just the same it would be just the same, but it’s in the imperfections, the hard times, and unexpected moments that causes us to see the beauty in the other moments of life.

Life is colorful. And that makes it beautiful. Celebrate the gift of your today. Embrace the moments, give yourself grace, and find moments to laugh in this perfectly imperfect beautiful motherhood.