one last book

In the light of the moon a little egg lay on a leaf…

Read to me, mom?

It was The Very Hungry Caterpillar.

A book that I’ve owned for over twenty years. In fact, it was the very first book I ever bought – in those early days of pregnancy with my first. It sat on the shelf, moved all over and remained one of those books that I just couldn’t part with. In fact, I probably have the words memorized. Ha. I think I do.

And tonight my not so little seven year old Samuel brought a stack of books into my room for his decided sleepover.

Read a book?

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I started reading. And for some reason tonight I didn’t have that oh so common in a minute that I find myself normally mumbling. For some reason I just felt the need to read. And then I picked up that Caterpillar book and tears filled my eyes.

How many years have I read this? How many moments with my kids?

As the words came out the finite reality of book reading hit my heart. The days were numbered now. No longer am I reading that caterpillar book for my oldest for whom I bought it. Now she lives on her own in an apartment in Seattle over a thousand miles from me. I’m not reading it for any of them really, and pretty soon, well, pretty soon that book will just sit on the shelf.

I’m so thankful for all the times I said yes to them.

I’m so thankful for all the times I said no to them as well.

I bet you don’t read that too often, do you? Those words about no?

But all the times I said no have made me realize just how important all the times I say yes are in life. Oh how I cherish those moments and times where I gave myself the grace to slow down and read words.

He started to look for some food…

Moms, time will pass and there will one day be one last book.

Cherish those moments where you say yes. Cherish those stories that you tell.

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Because one day you will read that last page and it will be put on the shelf to stay…… and he was a beautiful butterfly.

~Rachel

5 Responses to “one last book”

  1. January 24, 2017

    Sarah Reply

    Such beautiful, eloquent, simple thoughts – thank you. Letting the tears fall!

  2. January 25, 2017

    Chelo Reply

    Thanks for this article, Rachel! And for the many inspiring words you had written. I love reading them. And I can totally relate.
    For this specific article, I really try my best to say “yes” to reading books to my kids (5 and 3 yo) before bedtime no matter how exhausted I am. We always look forward to reading stories. I let them choose the books for the night — these are all from the books we borrowed (which they chose) from the Public Library.
    I enjoy and cherish our reading time at the moment. I am not ready to read the last page yet.

  3. January 25, 2017

    Sam Reply

    Reading to my daughter and incorporating books into her life is so important to me. I don’t look forward to the time where she doesn’t want me to read to her every night. I love the reminder to cherish the moment. And we love this book, too. I think I know every word!

  4. January 26, 2017

    Sierra Reply

    This is so beautiful! I never thought of it this way… one day there will be a last time we do each thing with our children. I need to cherish these moments with them more because one day they will only be memories.

  5. January 28, 2017

    Hannah Reply

    Just come accross your blog and really love your simple but poignant words. You have a real gift for capturing truth. Thank you for sharing your gift.

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