To you, the mother.
To you, perhaps the tired mother who wants to throw her hands in the air and have a good cry over the frustration of the day but can’t even figure out what exactly made it so frustrating. To you the mother with littles who need you 25 hours in a 24 hour day. To you the mother, in whatever season of motherhood you may be in who needs a reminder about motherhood. To you, the mother, who might wonder if all of this mothering stuff really does make a difference.
Well, it does. And here is a small reminder of why.
You see, you are an amazing being. You get up before dawn and go to sleep well past the setting sun. And often, you stay awake through out the nights – waking to the cry of an infant or the whimper of a toddler with a bad dream or up watching for the teenager to return home. You, even though you’re tired, wake in the morning and put a smile on your face and look at those little ones who kept you up through the night and whisper to them I love you. It’s a love that isn’t dependent on sleep or looks or agendas.
It’s a mother’s love.
You cook and bake and clean and do it all again. And again. And again. So often when there’s nothing in the pantry you can work your magic and pull a meal together that gets the cheers and hoorays of those sitting around your table. But you have thick skin – often the meals are met with noses turned and sighs and little ones telling you they really don’t like whatever you lovingly prepared. And then, dear mother, you negotiate and barter and set limits and hope that they eat at least two bites before they wash it down with the diluted half milk half chocolate milk mixture.
You are the chief problem solver. You can handle any argument – whose turn it is to unload or load or if one kid is bothering the other way too much. You have limits on name calling, yelling, fibbing, and teasing. You have mastered the art of counting to ten – in a row. You know when to step back and climb the stairs and sit on the floor in the bathroom and count to one hundred and then come out with a renewed sense of energy. And even if you don’t have you just push through. And sometimes, it means pbjs or pancakes for dinner – and then your kids think you’re even cooler.
You budget and drive and clean. And laundry? You breathe it. Day in and day out and day in and day out. Those mystery and long lost socks are no match for you the sorter, folder, and organizer. And even when you get behind you still joke about taming Mount Washmore even though really, really you wish for just one week where you didn’t have to fold all of those clothes. But, deep down, hidden in there, you know that this is a season – a sweet season – where the onesies, blankets, size 2T socks, soccer shorts, and leotards get to be in your wash. So you breathe deep and try to remember the value and sweetness of these fleeting years while you fold the stack of wrinkled t-shirts.
You, dear mother, are amazing. So often you look at all others are doing and then you measure yourself with a stick that is much too short. You’ll look at all they do and miss the amazing things you do. No one knows your kids the way you do – their quirks, sense of humor, and how to finally get them to stay in bed. You know when to just ignore the noise and keep on talking. You know them. You go to bed exhausted and wake up tired and yet you still give and do it the next day because you love the ones who call you mom.
You need a reminder today, a reminder of your greatness. And so today, to you the chief budget keeper, problem solver, sock folder, rocking chair rocker, temperature taker, sitter up till the teen gets home, sweeper, toy sorter for the tenth time in a day, listener, driver to and fro, cooker, cleaner, medicine giver, tamer of the laundry, repeated reader of books, and giver of self you need to remember that what you are doing today makes a difference.
It matters.
Motherhood matters greatly. The littles or middles or bigs in your home look at you. Their mom. They see the good – the way you give, the sweet things you do, the meals you make – and they love you. You deserve to be loved. And sometimes, sometimes they forget to tell you. Sometimes they yell at you or don’t obey or say things like I hate you and all of that. Those things don’t define you. Instead of quitting you just keep going. You go through sleepless nights, tight budgets, crabby kids, worry about tomorrow, homework being lost, times being sick, more sleepless nights, and all of the above plus more. Those tender hugs from years passed matter just as much today as do those moments where you want to whisper I quit but instead keep going.
That is my definition of a hero.
You are a hero.
Every single day. When you get up and rise and love on those kids and give of self. Don’t ever listen to the lies of the world that tell you that you are only a good mom if you do x, y, and z. Motherhood isn’t graded by the number of pinterest projects completed, or clever facebook status updates, or perfectly executed birthday parties, or the number on the scale. Motherhood isn’t this quantifiable thing – it’s not graded by everything you accomplish, but rather is a beautiful example of giving of self and loving even when the reserve tank is empty.
Your heart gives everyday.
So you, sweet mother, today I want you to move through your day – no matter how your day is – and remember that you are making a difference. Those kids who seem forever young will grow. And you, you are the one blessed with today and the time to walk that growing up journey with them. In all the bumps, twists, turns, and ups and downs no matter what you are their mother.
And that is something to be absolutely celebrated today.
Carry on superhero.
Carry on
~Rachel
60 comments
What a beautiful description of my life! And probably the lives of many others. I needed a reminder today — that it all matters. Thank you.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you xxx
Thank you for this…moved to tears, but tears of being appreciated. You are a talented, inspiring writer. 🙂
You are all welcome.
I’m so grateful for your words. I wrote this after a night of doing dishes, negotiating whose turn it was with a toy, picking up the living room for what felt like the hundredth time in the day, and all of that mom stuff. It’s a reflection of my heart and the desire for moms to know how much they matter. Which you all do. 🙂
Blessings to each of you today.
Rachel
I really sincerely needed to hear this right at this very moment.
This really helped me on a project to sum um how mums are such heroes
Thank you, thank you. Your posts always move me, but this one moved me more than most, even to tears. It’s so lovely to be understood.
Thank you for such an inspiring blog.
Hannah x
Thank you for that. We’re in the middle of the terrible-twos with my only son where every thing we say is tested & temper tantrums are frequent on top of colds and germs for everyone in the house right now. It’s a trying time. I’ve been laying in bed several night wondering if I’m doing it wrong, if he knows how much I love him, etc. Your posts are exactly what I need some days. Thank you.
Thank you Hannah and Margy. I, too, have had my share of days where I’m wondering if I’m doing it right or wrong or I’m just completely exhausted.
Mom are amazing.
Keep doing what you are doing, keep loving on your kids, and remember that you are making a difference.
rachel
Thank you for your words…they are always just the thing to keep a tired mom going. Hope your little guy is feeling better soon!
“Every single day. When you get up and rise and love on those kids and give of self. Don’t ever listen to the lies of the world that tell you that you are only a good mom if you do x, y, and z. Motherhood isn’t graded by the number of pinterest projects completed, or clever facebook status updates, or perfectly executed birthday parties, or the number on the scale. Motherhood isn’t this quantifiable thing – it’s not graded by everything you accomplish, but rather is a beautiful example of giving of self and loving even when the reserve tank is empty.” … love this!
xoxo,
Lani
You have an amazing way with words! Thank you for inspiring me to keep plugging along!
wow i needed that today, thank you!! the way you describe things with words is amazing, loved reading this post!
Thank you. That was beautiful….and uplifting and inspiring. Thank you for your kind words.
After a night up with my 3 1/2 year old with croup and my son who just decided to have a restless nights sleep, I woke up cranky, I needed to read this today. Thankyou for understanding.
Thank you…I have a teenager, 10 year old that suffers from extreme migraines and a 14 mo old. They are a blessing but I am beyond drained and needed this today!
With this blog you encourages me, a Dutch mother of six children. Although one of five can no longer live at home because of his disability you give me at this moment tears of joy in my eyes. Thousands of thanks. (And what a nice pictures)
Wow. That was beautifully written. Thank you! You’ve become such an inspiration to me. I begin to think of you when things turn crazy and this is most often enough to lift me up again. Thank you taking the time to write this. It really matters!!
This just makes me want to weep because I so WANT that to be me but I don’t feel it is 🙁 I find my nearly 4 year olds questions irritating, snap at my 2 year old and am going mad with sleep deprivation with my 5 month old. I feel so sad! I know this is such a precision season and I HATE the feeling that I’m failing at it. I so WANT this to be me!
Rose
Dear Rose,
You are in one of the hardest stages of parenting – when they are little you give and give and give. And you are not failing.
Read this -> http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/2012/08/dear-sweet-mom-who-feels-like-she-is.html
Blessings to you today. You are amazing.
Rachel
Rachel thank you SO MUCH. I can’t tell you how directly that spoke to my heart. Thank you thank you. Yes I did read to my children today, made cakes with them (who cares they were out of a box!), obviously fed them, hugged them, told them I loved them etc etc. You’re right, I’m not failing. Thank you, I really mean that.
Rose
Definitely something I need to hear often. It also made me think, though, how much of this journey in motherhood is not done solo. Most importantly, how much of the daily mundane “stuff” my husband really helps with to keep me sane. Well, at least not certifiable. Thanks for the inspiration!
You are very welcome Rose. Trying isn’t failing and what you did really does matter and makes a difference. Those sweet I love you words bless children greatly. I am glad that you are having a good afternoon. Thank you for writing me back – I’m grateful.
And, Rakstar mom, you are right. So much of motherhood is blessed by linking arms – I am grateful for the help of my husband and the encouragement of friends. Words, support, and kindness certainly makes a difference.
Blessings to you both today!
Rachel
Your blog is truly an inspiration to me. I am going through a really tough period in my life right now, and some days, I swear you are speaking directly to my heart. Thank you for reminding me of what is really important. xo
Takes one to KNOW one!
Thanks!!
Sweet blessings to you today Alicia – hoping for peace and calmness in the midst of life and a reminder to how much what you do matters.
Rachel
Beautifully said Rachel!
Spot on …. as always!
The refusing to eat thing really stood out to me. We are so fighting that battle right now and it is so frustrating! Thanks for the encouragement.
You are a breath of fresh air…I look so forward to your posts. Thank you for your hard work to encourage us. You either remind me of my value as a mother or remind me to enjoy this ever too quickly passing season of life…..both the utmost important aspects of motherhood. Thank you!
I cant possibly tell you how much your blog and your thoughts mean to me. You always speak right to my heart..this brought tears to my eyes. After being up at 345am with my precious 2 year old daughter who’s cutting her molars…I needed this!
I just recently deleted my facebook because I felt like I was taking away from her and I wanna be a more present mother. So many times I feel like im failing and then she wraps those lil arms around me and says.. “I love you Mommy”..makes it all worth it!
You inspire me!
God Bless you & your family 🙂
It’s interesting reading these posts from the perspective of one who’s kids are pretty much out of the house and establishing families of their own…
Praying in Seattle!
Psalms 28:6-7 Blessed be the LORD, because he hath heard the voice of my supplications. The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him.
My email address
Rachel, Thank you. Thank you for speaking what is on your heart. I needed this today. I needed it so desperately. I wrote a post about it. How you inspired me.
http://loganandjack.blogspot.com/2013/01/i-promise.html
I can’t thank you enough. I had a beautiful day with my children because you inspired me to see myself (and my job as their mother) differently.
~Shelly
Utterly beautiful. Thank you for this wonderful post.
Thank you, Andrea. And bless you in your quest to be more intentional.
Anna – I totally get the refusing to eat battle. We’re in the midst of that with two of mine. 🙂
Thank you everyone for your kind words. I really do appreciate hearing them and learning more about your stories. I love the support and encouragement that we can give each other.
Rachel
Thank you so much for these words. Which made me cry. I hope and pray that my little sees love in all the giving I do. But so often with working I feel like I have no more to give. And that is just the worst feeling.
“Motherhood isn’t graded by the number of pinterest projects completed, or clever facebook status updates…” YES YES
YES! Beautiful post!
AMAZING! This is one of the best articles ever and I am printing it out and keeping it until I’m old and gray! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
OMG! Thank you! It’s really what I needed to hear today 🙂
Lifting up prayers right now!
Psalms 28:8-9 The LORD is their strength, and he is the saving strength of his anointed. Save thy people, and bless thine inheritance: feed them also, and lift them up for ever.
My email address
What an incredibly beautiful post! I think there are a lot of moms out there that needed to read this today. I know I did. Thank you for your uplifting words. Thank you.
Thank you! I so needed to read this today!!!!
Very sweet. Even sweeter is the fact that a friend sent this to me having pictured me as she read your words. Those of us raising children with disabilities often hear how “amazing” and “inspiring” we are; are often told, “I don’t know how you do it.” The truth is, we just do.
Thank you. This went straight to my heart.
Godbless this post! mam are you born again christian? i love your post. i think your doing this in the name of God’s kingdom
Andre
________________
Childrens Party Ideas
Ahh. This is beautiful!! You will never know how much your words are appreciated. Posts like these reassure me as a mama that I am not alone. I am okay. I am loved. Thank you!! Sharing so all my mama friends can see this too!
Im going through a tough time and needed to hear this. So thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Thank you for this. I have a preteen and three under three. There are some really rough days and nights. Granted the youngest is 2.5 months. God Bless you! Your words are so kind and are great reminders!!!!!
This was the one day I needed this reminder most. I had a Bad Mom moment this morning over a pair of lost shoes that’s had me in a funk all day. I’m sure she forgot about it the moment she sat next to her best friend on the bus, but it’s been on my mind all day.
Bawling at my desk at work. You don’t know how badly I needed this! Thank you!
In tears. Spoke volumes to me. Thank you.
Thanks for posting such a wonderful blog like this, I’m sure all moms out there will be inspired by this blog. I’m so emotional while reding this thing on, I must confessed! Proud Mommy here!
Thank you for your beautifully written words. They spoke straight to my heart. I’ve have been feeling like a failure nearly every minute of every day. Even to the point where I thought that my children deserved a Better mom, that I didn’t deserve them and that they would be better off without me. I know that I make mistakes, but your post reminded me of what really matters. Thank you.
Vickie
Just beautiful. Thank you x
[…] https://findingjoy.net/why-moms-are-heroes/ […]
[…] https://findingjoy.net/why-moms-are-heroes/ […]
thanks
Just want to say, yours is one of my very favorite blogs and I follow ALOT of blogs:)
Wow!! Thank you Katelyn. 🙂
Had one of those frustrating days where you’re not even sure why it was frustrating. This was good to hear.
Except for the part about Facebook posts. I live for my clever Facebook posts. I’m pretty sure other people do too.