1.Watch your tone. On the day full of mom cries when you answer short and impatient with your kids — you know the what now? response — that is the time when your sweet four year old will answer with a very innocent, and very humbling I love you back. Then you simply must snap out of your mood, and get over the frustration with the constant cries for you, the mom, and pick up the four year old and tell him you love him back.
2. Toys don’t get dumped out to irritate you. Case in point: Yesterday, the same four year old and his brother spent 3.5 minutes dumping out boxes and boxes of sorted toys that took me 35 minutes to clean up {with their help, of course}. My first and initial response? That they’re trying to bother me, they don’t love me, they don’t care about me — then I remember — they are two and four years old. They just like to dump things out into one massive pile. It’s not about bugging mom – it’s about playing and being a kid.
3. You will share your coffee {and all your food}. Not a day goes by when I don’t hear the inevitable sip-a-coffee mom? or can I have a taste? or just a little bit? cry from one of my kids. I bring home a latte from Caribou and they all want a sip — which is why I’m thinking from now on I’ll need to order a large {or Venti at Starbucks}. Let them have tastes. They will soon grow up before you know it and you’ll be wishing for them to be little again and remembering the days when they just wanted a little taste.
4. Read stories to them. I am serious. How many times do we go through the day and tell them in a minute or after lunch or hold on or okay, let me just finish this with regards to stories and books? Make it a priority to read to them. Write it on your list. Cross it off. Every single day make it a point to stop your busy schedule so that you can sit on the couch with them and read. You won’t regret reading to them, but you will regret it later if you don’t. {that shirt? remember people like me}
5. If they ask to help, let them help. And, yes, it will get messy, messy, messy. But, you see, you are here to teach, to train, to encourage them — not have the perfect house and yard and image — and being a mom involves a mess. See point two, if you need to be reminded. If you don’t give them the freedom to try cracking an egg and making a mess then they will not learn. And, eggs are cheap, you know. Let them try. Take the extra time. Bless them with learning life skills especially when they ask to help!
6. Don’t push them away with the busy. Related to the others, of course, but ultimately, we as moms have lists of busy. Laundry, yard-work, cleaning, resorting toys into boxes, cooking, diaper changing, driving, bill-paying, sweeping, and more. All of that? Busy. All of that? It could last all day. And I mean it. My list of things to do is longer than the hours of my day. I cannot parent when the to-do list is done. Parenting, being a mother, happens in the midst of the to-do list and there are many times when it needs to trump the to-do list. So the boys have a room full of blocks and cars and trains on the floor — but we read at night — or they learned to sweep — or we took a walk. That stuff matters. Not the sorted toys.
7. Pray out loud with them. And not just at meals. Mothers, let them hear you pray. Let them hear you give thanks, and pray for patience, and pray for them — for their day, their homework, their friendships, and more. Prayer needs to permeate your life. Don’t just keep it boxed up only to be taken out before dinner and bed. Just as you teach them about life skills teach them to pray.
8. You are not alone. There are lots of us moms out there. You’re not alone in having hard days, good days, pull-out your hair days {read this post of mine here for proof}, sad days, and how will I get through days. Being a mom is hard work. Don’t let society, or tv, or magazines make you think that it’s a piece of cake. Because, honestly, it’s not. It’s hard. But, it’s also beautiful, joyful, humbling, lovely, life-changing, and a gift. Remember that more.
Embrace today, right where you are, in your maybe not so clean and perfect house. Embrace the little ones or maybe getting big ones. And make sure above all things to tell them all you love them. That is life. And that? It’s being a mom. You can do it.
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25 comments
These are definitely important things to remember about motherhood. We do tend to forget childhood only comes but once. Memories are far more important than a clean house.
I absolutely needed this today. In fact, I probably need to read this every day.
Thanks for the beautiful reminder, Rachel!
Blessings,
Steph
So nice to read this in the quiet of my house today before the children are awake. These are all wonderful.
I live it: “eggs are cheap”. :/)
So true! About the ‘tone’ of our conversations with our children…at Apologia Live, it was mentioned that our teens will talk to us…the way we talk to/at them when they are little….hmmmm…..me, I’m looking forward to the teen years. Love this post….and watching you travel the littles to the teens!
this was a blessing to read today, rachel. thank you for your words of wisdom and for the sweet reminder of what it is to be a mommy!
p.s. so, i should let my 1-year-old take sips of my diet coke? he always manages to get one, anyway! 😉
Rachel, Beautiful reminders! And photos, as usual! I miss my cuddle- read days with my girl…although we still do – not the read aloud kind as much unless it’s funny for sharing, just that time. It goes by so fast…
totally agree! you know, it’s like i’m on an egg free diet too, because inevitably mommy’s food is always better. i am sure you relate with gluten. the you are not alone part is so good – and yeah, it’s totally important to remember the beauty more than the hard times. praying with them – YES! we have Hunter repeat what we say and it is the cutest thing… i’m guilty of opening my eyes to watch him. : ) love you, rach, and thanks for sharing your wise self with me!
love this post. as i read each points, i thought to myself – my mom nailed every one of these! rarely did she snap at us, she always let us help, prayed out loud with us all day long… needless to say she was an amazing mom! now i just need to learn to practice these points with my own child!
Good post. I love your fb shirt you are wearing!!!
: ) Kris
LOVE this post. These are things I embrace and try to do every day. The one I DON’T do is pray aloud. Can’t believe I don’t! My son has asked me before, “Mommy, what are you doing?” and I tell him praying and tell him what I pray about and when I pray, etc. but I don’t pray aloud. Thanks for reminding me to! I LOVE your big family, it is my dream but with endometriosis and PCOS I don’t know if that will happen but I sure pray about it and now I will do it aloud! 🙂
Love every word. I find myself taking a step back and a deep breath and reminding myself to be present and mindful with my children more often than I’d like to admit.
What a fantastic post…so much truth here. It’s hard to be a Mom, but it’s so worth it!
great post, as always! love it!
Even grandmothers like myself appreciate these wonderful, timeless reminders. Thanks.
I loved reading each and every one of these ‘mom facts’. Thanks for sharing, 🙂
Mine always bust out an “I love you” when I’m at my wits end and then I feel totally guilty. But it is a good reminder to let the other stuff go!
P.S. I love that shirt!
ahh, i’m so guilty of the hold on or wait a minute or let mommy finish! it makes me feel so bad! what a great post and reminder. can you just come live here and mentor me? thanks for your mommy-wisdom…i deeply appreciate your blog!
I know this. I do….but sometimes I just need a little reminder 🙂
Thanks 🙂
such great thoughts! Thank you. Super good reminders, especially on this Monday :).
God bless–
This should be published Rachel. What sound advice for any Mom. If I could go back I’d do some things the same but some I’d definitely do better. I’m trying to do all the right things with the Grans. Happy Easter week!
Know that you’re in my thoughts and prayers!
Psalms 73:23-26 Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast holden me by my right hand. Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
My email address
I do not need a life coach or a spiritual guide or a book or website for motivation each day.
No.
All I need is YOU!
I love point #2. So often I think these little people are out to get me when it’s simply “being a kid.” Thanks for the reminder!
Beautiful post. Thank you! <3
Thank you!