Every year, before we start our fall schedule, I step back and take just a moment to write down notes for the year. They’re not notes like a successful day is day where everything gets checked off but are rather little phrases and words for me to remember so that on the inevitable I want to throw in the towel days I can read them and remember the good.
These? These are five of my joy reminders.
1. Time is precious. I need to put this in every single room of my house. Time is short and we do not know how much time we’re given. The five year old sitting next to me in the morning who wants to play slapjack when I have an inbox that is bursting and a load of laundry that needs to be switched? He sat there way too long waiting for his in a minute and just a second mom to answer to his mom, now can you play? cries. So, you know what? We played that round of slapjack – for five minutes – and his heart was full. That matters. Work for a balance – accomplish what needs to get done, but also keep the grace and freedom to step out of the to-do list and attend to the hearts of those around us. I won’t regret not finishing the to-do list every day, but I will regret being too distracted that I let childhood slip by.
2. Little things matter more. Back to that game of slapjack {which we finished} – the look of joy and gratitude on Elijah’s face? Total worth it. His heart was full. The notes we leave our kids, the great jobs and high fives, and the I love you’s matter more. So often I judge my days on the big stuff – if I accomplished the laundry, met all my goals, had a great dinner – but I don’t remember all the little things that were done. The reading of the extra book, sitting with the toddler walking, a kind word to the gal at the grocery store, the joy over chocolate chip cookies, all of those beautiful moments tucked within the busy of the everyday. Teach your kids as well to not lose sight of the little moments within the everyday.
3. Don’t rush. So often I will race through what I need to get done so I can get to the next thing that has to get done so I can get to the next thing that has to get done so I can get to the next. And it doesn’t stop. So I start to rush and move faster and ultimately lost sight of today. I don’t want to be the distracted mom. Does that mean I don’t work? Absolutely not. There is work to be done, and it should be done the best that we can, and we need to embrace work as a blessing and not complain. After all, we still need clean laundry, dishes done, and food to eat. But, it does mean that I allow myself grace to step back and slow down in the midst of the to-do list.
4. Keep moving. Pretty funny, after don’t rush, right? In the movie Nemo there’s the line just keep swimming. Swimming, swimming, swimming. The idea of that line? Adopt that in life. Now, it doesn’t mean rushing through everything, but rather, to me, it’s about trying again. And again. And not giving up. When I sit in the I can’t do this moments of life I get stuck. I’ve learned to expect that the day won’t go as planned, and therefore when it does get off track it doesn’t come as the surprise but rather part of what is normal. So the spills on the floor, coloring on the wall, turn around the car and go back home because we forgot something, the nothing to eat for dinner, the laundry left in the washer, the fights, the dumping out the toys, the I can’t find my shoes – all of that? Normal. I just need to keep moving and counting my blessings. Just keep moving.
5. Be grateful for today. Step back and see all the good in today. Smell the sweet smell of the baby. Remember the toddler’s laugh. Enjoy listening to the play between kids. Sometimes it is so hard to live grateful and joyful. And, in fact, it is a discipline. It takes work to shift our hearts to being numb and asleep to the good within the world to actually being able to see them. Find one thing each day to be grateful for. Start with one and gradually you will find many more. Those things will probably be the little things that matter in point two. Adopt gratitude. The days with a toddler with science glasses wandering around with an ice cream pail will matter more than the towel on the chair and the pile of books that fell over. I am thankful. Those are words that I try to teach myself to say every single day. Today I am thankful for….
May this fall season of yours be full of blessings, joy, and celebration of the everyday beauty in life.
Find joy in the everyday.
That’s what I remind myself.
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10 comments
I just started following your blog a week or so ago. Wow! I happened to stumble upon it when I was having a hard mommy day (we all know it wasn’t by chance, it was a God thing) My youngest son, 13 months old, was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. Your blog has helped me be a better mom and also believe that I am good enough and God’s perfect choice of a mother for my two beautiful children. You are truly a blessing and I know I don’t speak alone when I say that you are inspiring. So, thank you for your constant blogging. 😉 (I started blogging at the start of my sons diagnosis and boy is it therapeutic)
Beautiful reminder of the need to slow down and be present in our lives with our children. May you have a blessed Fall season as well!
Thank you, Thank you!! Wonderfully written and heartfelt. I need to tape this on my walls!!
Another perfect post! Thank you!
that windowsill picture stole my heart. your words did too! xo!
Praying right now!
Psalms 31:1-3 In thee, O LORD, do I put my trust; let me never be ashamed: deliver me in thy righteousness. Bow down thine ear to me; deliver me speedily: be thou my strong rock, for an house of defence to save me. For thou art my rock and my fortress; therefore for thy name’s sake lead me, and guide me.
My email address
Rachel, I have a 7yo who simply can NOT seem to find any joy. I don’t mean that he never has fun (he does) but that his standard approach to life right now seems to be “I’m mad about this and sad about that and I never get to do XYZ and I didn’t want THAT kind of ice cream.” I try to make a point of verbally noticing joyful things in our life (setting a good example and all!) and I’ve also started working with him so that when he says something negative we try to find something positive that he could notice instead.
Nothing really seems to be helping, though, and quite honestly his negativity is driving me half way to distraction. :/ It is pretty hard to hear, day after day, all the “terrible” things that make up his life.
Have you encountered this with any of your kids? Do you have any ideas for how to help him see the sunshine?
Thank you!
Thank you for this post! Like the others who commented as such, I think I was led here today. I SO NEEDED this this morning!
KatieJ
I found your blog through a friend who posted a letter on facebook. Thank you so much for the encouragement, your heart for the Lord and others screams through what you write (often w/out addressing the topic directly). I have written down these 5 reminders in my Moleskin – to be put up with my other reminders in my home office. Thank you again!
GREAT list. Great great great great great.