to my kids, what I need you to know about friends

You are  great kids.

Like super awesome. You make me smile, even though you test me at times. And because I love you so dearly, so deeply, there are truths about friendship that I need you to know.  In fact, these are things that I need to remember, even as your mom. Because it is so easy to compromise and to not be the friend others need or to think it’s okay to be treated a certain way. But friendship? It’s not something we all just “get” but is rather something we learn. And that’s why I wrote this.

I need you to remember this about friends:

  1. Friends are a gift. Treat them well. In fact, treat them how you would want them to treat you.
  2. Friends challenge you to be better, not challenge you to compromise.
  3. Friends support your dreams.
  4. Friends show up for you.
  5. Friends are a reflection of your heart too.
  6. Friends make you laugh.
  7. Friends, real friends, are worth fighting for.
  8. Friends listen.
  9. Friends don’t make fun of others.
  10. Friends remember you.
  11. Friends will tell you if you look good or that outfit doesn’t look good or if you have something in your teeth.
  12. Friends are trustworthy.
  13. Friends give back, they don’t just take.
  14. Friends get “you”.
  15. Friends care deeply for each other.
  16. Friends get in the trenches, the messy spaces of life with you.
  17. Friends are empathetic, but they don’t let you wallow.
  18. Friends have your back..
  19. Friends are a gift, never take them for granted.
  20. Friends make you a better you.

But most importantly, sweet kids of mine, this is the type of friend I want you to be.

Let me repeat that: be the friend that you need.

You can be that friend to another person. But it involves you being real, dropping your masks and sticking to your beliefs. Don’t ever think you’re not good enough for another or let another person dictate your worth.

Love your friends deeply.

Just like I do you.


My book, The Brave Art of Motherhood, tells WHY friendship is important and lays the groundwork for great friendships. Get your copy on Amazon or Autographed or at Bookstores near you.

One Response to “to my kids, what I need you to know about friends”

  1. September 7, 2018

    Sharm Running Reply

    So poignant, especially this week, as my oldest grandson was made fun of, and bullied, cuz he didn’t know how to play soccer. In his school, they are taught to be kind and respectful. He didn’t know how to retaliate to these bullies. It hurts my heart.

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