For a long time, healing became its own cycle for me. It was almost like I was waiting until I was fully “better” before I let myself enjoy life. But that left me treading water. And if you’ve ever treaded water, you know: you get tired, and, even though you put in the effort, you don’t move anywhere. Treading water is a form of survival, not forward motion.
I know me, and I know I’d rather be crashing into the shore instead of being stuck at sea.
I like to move.
I like progress.
I don’t like to feel stuck.
So, you can only imagine how frustrated I ultimately became.
But I’m also grateful. Because in that stillness, I realized life is filled with treading water moments and crashing into the sea moments and not knowing what to do moments and being so tired to “swim” forward moments, yet you still do. And in my wondering, I also dared to pause and examine the beliefs I held about healing, and in that moment, I discovered some truths about myself.
- I work better with structure and data.
- I keep momentum with goals and accountability.
- I need meditation and yoga to steady my mind.
- I get distracted by new “shiny” programs/ideas.
- The summer is “typically” a harder season for me.
(These are mine. Yours may look different, and that’s the point. They’re not a formula, just a place to start reflecting.)
Now I find myself in a new yet familiar space of starting again and catching momentum.
I feel more grounded, focused, and determined. I also feel more connected and filled with energy. And to be transparent, I don’t believe I would have gained this clarity unless I let myself tread water, whether it was comfortable or not. It was the willingness to stop that allowed me to see what actually mattered, what actually benefited me, and what I needed to just set down.
And in that, I had this powerful realization: I don’t want to pile every new goal, expectation, or discipline on at once anymore. That only leaves me overwhelmed and exhausted.
Instead, I’m learning to layer.
Think of it like music, where you add one note, and then another, which works with another, and after a bit, harmony begins to rise. It’s a process of adding and still being okay with subtracting, until you get to the sound that you need.
Layering, at least in this season, feels kinder to my soul. And in that kindness, you guessed it, I’ve not only caught my breath again, but have really let myself breathe. And in the breath, you have space to grow.
I found that layering allows each step to take root, just a bit, before the next begins. It’s not about racing or checking things off just to check them off, but rather is about becoming steady, grounded, present, and open to opportunities with enough space to adapt, shift, and grow.
For me, here are some of my layers:
- daily yoga practice that I track
- adding protein and counting macros (haha, can you tell I’m in midlife?)
- pausing before I say “yes” when my heart is really whispering “not right now.”
- drinking more water
- dedicating time to free write
- committing to track progress and being honest about what works and what doesn’t
Now remember, I didn’t add all of those at once. It actually started with adding yoga back into my life. I got off track (after completing 100 days in a row), and during the pause, I realized I really benefit from the daily practice — both physically and mentally. It also meant that I let myself feel the stiffness that resulted from taking the break, which impressed on me the importance of a routine.
Now, maybe they seem small or simple, but together, they’re shifting my soul and my energy. They’re giving me the confidence to create change, and as another day passes, I find myself feeling proud. I’m also learning to give myself the grace to let life unfold, but not as a reason to stop, but rather as a reminder to keep trying.
Maybe that’s the truth: we don’t need to reinvent ourselves in one sweeping motion. We just need to let the layers build, slowly, quietly, until one day we notice we’re no longer stuck, but we’ve grown.
So here’s my invitation: What’s one layer you could add this week? What is one small thing that feels like support instead of pressure? What is a simple ritual to add?
Try one thing this week. See how it feels. Live with it for a while. If it supports you, keep it. If not, shift. That is the beauty of layers.
Layers don’t demand perfection; instead, it’s an invitation to keep going.
Start small. Let it fold into your days almost unnoticed. And then, one morning, you will realize it is no longer something you are trying, but it has become part of your life.
Remember, the life you want isn’t built in one day.
It’s built one choice, one step, one layer at a time.
With joy,
Rachel
